Soliloquies in the Snow [Open]

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If everything in life had a meaning, what was the meaning of life itself? Was it the composite concoction of every being and object’s niche, or was it something different entirely, separate from the world and yet responsible for it, like a deity? Well how about the meaning of existence for individuals?

Ashy paws silently padded through the snow, perfectly accustomed to the loose powder. The leopardess was on a weekend from the library work, as it was Wednesday, and her border duties were not until dusk. She left a gap between her jaws, taking in the air and nearby scents while contemplating the deeper subjects of her conscious interests… Take the ant, for instance. His tiny body was created to serve the purpose of a pawn in hierarchy, a peon whose individuality was subordinated to the superiority of the community. It would seem selfish for the ant to take his findings for himself and enjoy his brief life as he should, but what about the desires of that small creature? What if all he wanted in life was to be an avant-garde soul – more than just another statistic… More than just another worker in the mass…

And what then of the higher mammals? Though many rogues flicker in the existence they call reality, most will then meld themselves into some form of social structure dominated by a hierarchy. What is their purpose? What of those who remain a loner for their entire lifetime… If the purpose of a communal member is the improvement of the conditions in the community, is the purpose of a rouge the betterment of their own life? If so, then such an individual is a god among mundanes, though they are often treated as swine. They hold the key to their own happiness, whilst others must search for permission. Those who devote their lives to an organization of like individuals are always controlled by one another in a particular fashion; such a setting is inevitable. It is a tree, a pyramid, a cone… Where the highest authority is the most exclusive and is therefore superior. What an interesting thought, that by dominance and exclusion one could gain followers. Some rule by enticement, some by fear, and many by a combination. Some leaders one fears to disappoint, and others conceive such a high level of reverence within their subordinates that one simply wants to please and follow. Jagara paused, closing her eyes for a moment. Her superiors were who they were, and that would not change. She had chosen to follow Eden for the sake of following a cause worth dying for, and the tigress had provided with not only such, but with a warm den and open – though clawed – paws. With a slight sigh, she continued at a gentle trot, allowing her thoughts to once again wander.

Her mind flittered to the workers and overseers. Jagara was currently both, chosen to slave under two ranks yet command over the majority. As a holder of rank, she was respectable and trustworthy, but as an individual she was replaceable. A rank or a position is just a thin shelf on the wall, and those above her could knock her down just as easily as they could pull her up. But that was where such blessings and curses ended. She could do nothing against those above her, just as those below her had little choice about their female Epror. It was almost a case of predestination, where authority is granted to one by a higher being, but this time it was only by one of more fortune.  A small sigh escaped her jaws, inaudible in the morning gusts of wind, but faintly visible in a puff of warm vapor. And yet, she considered, any social structure is as much a web as it is a ladder. It is not a weaving of thick rope, no… It is of the finest strand of silk, a bond that is both strong and frail, pulling communities closer but able to be severed by the swipe of a clawed paw or a particularly strong breeze. A poor hand dealt from fate could mean seemingly eternal isolation, as leopardess knew all too well. Once again she felt the pain of loss, but for the first time she was ignorant to the real cause of death. There was no sense of closure for the poor female. Ariun had disappeared without a single trace, never to be heard from again. Jagara furrowed her brows momentarily, forcing the other possible causes for his sudden disappearance away with her usual assumption that he had slipped upon the cliffs and fallen to a mercifully quick death. At least that way, he was faithful throughout his life and was accepted back into the nature that he loved so much, his onyx pelt becoming one with the depths of the oceanic abyss. No one without concrete evidence would ever be able to convince her otherwise. For a moment, she wondered if she would be able to fully recover. Sure it had been several seasons since the ‘accident,’ but perhaps the heart can be broken beyond all repair as well.

Jagara reached a small clearing, a pool of virgin snow. A nostalgic smirk crossed the black membranes of her lips. As she looked around, a young snow leopard bounded into the clearing happily, bouncing in and out of the pristine blanket that seemed to consume her light grey pelt with each downbeat, then regurgitate it with every leap. Jagara’s grey-blue eyes watched the child’s image softly, but sharpened to their normal condition of disdain once the vision flickered and faded. Inhaling silently, she found a somewhat familiar scent near her- a fresh one. She knew not who was coming, but that detail would be clear within a few minutes of their travel once their specific scent came into range. The Epror glanced up and gracefully sprang into a tree, relaxing on one of the lower branches casually. Her long, muscular tail hung down to signify her presence among the camouflaging bare branches and snow. Stretching her body across the limb, she calmly waited and listened for the others.

The snow flurries fell from the sky. The white puffs of snow landed on the orange and black stripes of the predator as he walked through the trees. His body shifted from side to side with each step, his massive paws sinking into the snow as he walked. It was fresh, still falling and beautiful beyond compare. He was used to the cold, his family had adored it, and the snow. His Siberian roots were more than prepared for the falling fluff. As he walked, his head hung at a normal height, not too high as he did not own these lands, and not too low. His tail curled behind his legs, rolling and lolling from side to side. He loved being in his primal form, his most natural of them. For the longest time he had shared his human form with the Regina. It was her preference for their more intimate moments. He was not exactly sure why that was, but was sure to never question it. He walked his lonely path, searching for nothing really, just allowing his mind to wander as his legs moved him through the snow. His tail flicked from side to side, swinging between his legs. A familiar, yet new scent tickled his nostrils as he gazed ahead of himself. No longer was his mind allowed to wander aimlessly, but it was set on the purpose of following his eyes. His mind would be responsible for catching the images, collecting them, and sorting them to where the boy could understand what he was peering at. His onyx nostrils, covered in a glistening liquid, sifted through the common smells to discover Jagara. His eyes followed and found her within the trees. How beautiful. Simple as a thing of being within the trees.

Diallo had been far too large to rest in tress, whether they were high or low branches. He had tried before, but to no avail he found himself falling for the floor. Luckily, this large feline had a knack for falling on all fours. Taking a deep breath, he stared to the other feline and gave a smile. "Hello miss, I hope I am not startling anything by approaching you. I am Dux Diallo, and you are.. Jagara right? Epror to the Regina?"

The pleasantly cold air drifted into the leopardess’s jaws, the specialized gland located at the roof of her mouth filtering through the various scents as she waited for the strongest one to float closer. Mice, squirrels, and snow hares all floated around, mixed with snow and decaying foliage buried somewhere underneath. The strong scent of tiger soon reached her senses, the pungent stench of it signifying a male. This ruled out the Regina, so Jagara assumed it was that other tiger in the records… Diablo, Dello, Diallo, or whatever it was. It did not matter much. If he was coming this way, introductions with the holder of the Dux position would be held. She had personally accepted the female Dux, a snake shifter by the name of Calise. Jagara was rather proud of the progress the woman had made since her acceptance into the pack.

Silvery blue eyes watched the forest, patiently anticipating the guest. It seemed to be a while before he actually made his presence in a visual manner, his ambling speed explaining the length of the wait. Jagara’s gaze raked over his pelt, scrutinizing every movement of his muscles under the bright amber pelt as he approached. His body was larger than her own, but she could see both advantages and disadvantages in both of their forms when being compared. When she gave a final, silent breath to analyze and store his scent, she noticed the evident presence of Eden on him like a ribbon softly curling around a thorny stem. Secretly, it made her sick to think of any possible relationship, as she had convinced that she herself would never find a successful one. Twice she had found love, and twice she had lost her beloved mates to death. Finished with her inspection from above, she met his somewhat amiable emerald gaze with her own emotionless grey eyes. Listening to his address, she calmly curled her tail up over her spine and let it roll off of her shoulder, outranking the other for now. With a tone that suggested nothing more than its bare words, she replied, “To startle me would be to surprise me with your presence. I have known of your coming towards my location for a while now.” She gave a bored yawn that revealed ivory fangs, glistening brightly. The Epror then glanced to the clearing where her imagination had wandered before turning to finish her reply. “Yes, I am Jagara, Epror under Regina Eden. Unsurprisingly, I am the only snow leopard in a very large radius around these lands. Unless, of course, you consider the lesser developed wild animals at the zoo. But if you count such things, then even the uniqueness of your species is lessened.”

Rude. was the first word which came to mind within his head, but he would still stay true to himself. He would not allow this very first impression to mean anything. It was not in his nature to be impolite. Looking up to her, his smile grew wider. "One could also be able to startle one's thoughts when an unforeseen guest arrives. I do not mean you knew I was going to walk over here, but that you had no idea I was even going to walk over here today. I did not mean that I surprised you.." He looked over the feline, watching her resting in a way which looked peaceful, or at least at rest. Diallo continued to speak, calm and slow for her alone, "so what brings you here? Thinking of pack related things or perhaps a budding relationship?" Diallo could only think of Eden, most days. When he played his guitar, his fingers strummed the chords softly, allowing them to play the song of his heart. She was the reason for all his songs, his lyrics. He loved her more than he even knew. Every moment revolved around Eden. Some, if they knew, would call it an obsession, but he did not speak of the Regina unless he was asked to and even then he would limit his own words. This girl was his everything, his whole world.

A slight smirk curled the black membranes of her lips. How cute he was. A big smile on his chops, a friendly ring to his voice. She wondered for a moment if he baked cupcakes for his loved ones in the morning, maybe even adorned with bacon and maple syrup. She met his gaze evenly once more, “Ah yes, but one who keeps their mind open and ready is startled by little except an apocalypse. We share territory, right? So unless you arrived at the entrance to my own den, I would not call you a guest, nor unforeseen. In fact, I expect the others are milling about the territories currently, but perhaps they are off elsewhere. As for us two, we are the same as two neighbors meeting in a park. One would expect to see at least one familiar face at a park, no?” Her tone was of her usual speed and inclination, speaking bluntly yet implying nothing. Finished with her words momentarily, Jagara gracefully slid from her branch and landed silently in the snow, twisting her body to make sure that her wide, heavy paws hit the white blanket perfectly as not to create any auditory disturbance in the forest.

The pair of icy eyes hit his with a hard glance at his question, suppressing the pain his words aroused. This male seemed to have true feelings for the tigress whose scent he carried. Perfect. Another lovely relationship in full spring that would likely play out with a cliché ‘happily ever after.’ Jagara shook her head and turned to look at the clearing, “Can an Epror not idle around, lost in her own philosophy? Pack matters fill half of my job description and truly never leave my mind, but I allow them to become muffled in my thoughts when I am on break. Besides, my library is closed on Wednesdays, and the patrol schedule I chose does not start until dusk today.” She paused for a moment to swallow the frog that had crept up her throat back down to where he belonged, hidden away. “And no, Diallo. I have accepted that any love I find will be taken away from me. I do not know if you know what that feels like, but by the evident scent on your pelt and hints of the inclination of your thoughts in this very question, you feel a certain way about the Regina. Am I wrong?” Jagara looked back to him again, expecting a brief reply before she continued.

She was toying with him, he was not so naive. But he would keep his friendly position with the female, no matter how much she disliked his presence or even the fact that he was happy. She did not know him, and he did not know her, not really. "Jagara, I was only trying to make conversation with you. I meant nothing by it or to offend you. If you wish for me to leave, I will do so. I do not want you to feel any negative feelings towards me. But you are correct, it is very probable to see someone of the pack in an open area." He looked to her, watching her as she moved her body from the branches. His eyes fell with her as she landed with a soft crash. Her paws were pretty big for her small size, like nothing he had never seen before. The only shifters he had seen were tigers. His family, and now Eden. As his emerald orbs met the chilling ice color of hers, it felt as if she were angry with him, or even wishing to bring harm to him. But he did not fear her. He was much larger and knew how to fight. What damage could a small female do to him? He wasn't too sure, and soon his mind slipped from the thoughts. "What pack matter do you speak of. Not much has been happening. I understand patrolling the borders, I do it as well from time to time. Have you heard anything from the other races?"

But soon her body seemed to change. Something was different. "The only love which was ever taken from me, was that of my family. I was accused of a horrible crime I did not commit and my father did not trust my side of the story. He sent me away and trusted the treacherous female who made the accusation. My sister also believed it, and the way she looked at me before I left, I will never forget. She looked at me like I was a monster. Eden is the first girl I have ever loved, and will ever love. And she loves me too, so now, I do not know what it feels like to lose a love like that, and if you have... I feel sorry for you. I could not begin to imagine myself without Eden. She completes me."

Jagara disregarded his propositions to leave with a flick of her long tail. If he wanted to run like hell away from her, he could do so. As for her, she did not care who was near her and who wasn’t. As long as he was not in her personal space, it did not matter. His question of pack matters was also omitted. There did not have to be anything specific going on for her to be preparing for the time there would be. Organization, training of members, becoming familiar with the territory’s every inch to best know what space would be best for a possible ambush… Anything and everything on the domestic side was her business, and she had no intentions of giving this male a description of her job. As for the other races, she knew much about them but little from them. Perhaps something would come from the Beta werewolf… But nothing as of yet.

She listened to his little story about his family. Though it was indeed sad, even with this lack of detail, all Jagara could reply was, “At least you had a family to begin with. Mine left me when I was a cub.” His love for Eden was adorable: saying that he was her one and only, now and forever. A faint, sad smile rose to her lips, “Imagine seeing Eden’s pelt hanging from a banner in the middle of a town square. No… Even the sleekness of her white fur could not match the golden locks of Azeroth. The day I saw his hide hanging from a pole, I got these…” she briefly motioned to the jagged horizontal scars on the knee joint of her hind legs before continuing, “You can imagine that I had to run from the city. After I shredded that bastard of a hunter to pieces, of course. Now… Say you spend the next two centuries healing your heart, training your body, and travelling. Then you arrive at a new pack, earn a decent rank, and somehow stumble across someone who makes you whole again. Then you fall in love again, something you think would be impossible, and claim one another as mates. And finally, they just disappear into thin air without a trace. I assume Ariun fell to his death off of the cliffs at the edge of the territory… There is no other explanation. He’d never leave me. Not without a single word…” She trailed off for a moment, looking to him evenly, the usual look of burning ice in her eyes. “I don’t think there is a happy ending for me. So I gave up looking. Besides, there are more important things in life.”

The Epror’s smoked grey ears flickered at the pitter-patter of paws. As she glanced to their origin, Jagara saw Arthas burst through the snow. He bounded to her side, skidding to a stop and shaking off the specks of white from his fur. With a huff, his blue and hazel eyes looked up to his master, a small smile upon his chops. Jagara sighed and looked at him, “I thought I’d asked you to wait at the den…” To this, the dog grumbled softly in protest and nudged her leg with his nose. The leopardess looked to Diallo with a slight chuckle as the nose poked her repeatedly, “This is Arthas, the Australian Shepherd. The only creature left that I trust fully and unconditionally.” Arthas puffed his chest proudly at the mention of his name and, with a glance up at the tiger, went to go sniff his striped pelt. “He’s used to big cats. Don’t worry though, he doesn’t bite without reason.” Her words had a soft warning growl of an undertone, expecting Diallo to behave with the canine. The Aussie trotted around the male, taking in his scent in several places, before returning to his master. Throughout the meet-and-greet, Jagara watched the movements of Diallo closely, making sure that no harm came to her beloved pet. She sat down on her haunches, easily curling her tail around the entire base of her body. She was silently thankful for the arrival of Arthas, not wanting to linger on the subject of her deceased mates for much longer.

Diallo watched her, she was listening it seemed. She then began painting a picture, a horrid one. It was an image of Eden hurt, dead. It struck his heart to even think of such a thing. How could that even be possible. "I would hope that if something like that would never happen, for she is the Regina of these lands. If any stranger came too close, I would kill them myself. It is our duty to protect her, me as a Dux, and you an Epror. I don't know how your old mate was murdered, but it is a horrible loss. I apologize for it is such a gruesome sight to have to see. But I can honestly tell you, nothing will happen to Eden. I will lay outside her den each night and watch for anything suspicious. I will follow her everywhere she goes if I can make sure that her life is safe. I would gladly give mine to keep her from harm. I apologize again for your second mate, which also is unfortunate. But I will not let it happen to me. I won't let it happen to her." Diallo stood tall as he spoke these words. He was not edge, but he was feeling the need to get his voice heard. He loved her more than anything in the world. She completed him. She was his everything. The large tiger stood his guard as they spoke, he could feel his muscles tighten, and his heart beat fast within his chest.

A strange smell entered the area around him. It was that of a canine, one he had not yet met. But it was laced with the smells of Jagara and the pack. It was living here, perhaps and undoubtedly with her. As the small dog bounded their way, it moved towards Jagara and rested itself near her. Diallo had never really been around dogs, nor did he feel to comfortable because of it. But no Siberian Tiger was going to fear a measly little tail-less pup. The coloring of the patches was quite appealing however, gorgeous in its own light. "It is nice to meet you Arthas," he said softly as the creature began to sniff his coat. What a strange thing, dogs. "So how long have you had this little pup?" he asked as he was trying to change the subject. His mind rattled fervently in his mind, mixing up the thoughts of Eden and harm possibly coming to her. These thoughts caused him to stay tight, ready.